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5

I’m gonna be a stalker! That’s not really a career. More of a felony. Man, I’m gonna stalk his brains out. Ooh! Big news on the Calculon fansite! There’s a flash mob headed for his plastic surgeon’s office! There, that’s as big as I can make it. But I caution you, it looks completely unrealistic. You let me worry about that! Just do your job. Very well. Will you be using your SAG insurance? No, cash. I’d like to be discreet. Dear God, no! Oh boy, oh boy, he’s here. Calculon, I love you! Have my baby! CALCULON.

It’s too late. The inspector’ll be here in exactly one second. Who are you? Morgan Proctor, grade 19. Hermes Conrad, grade 36. Enough banter. Shall we begin? Don’t worry. I have a plan. I’m going to jump! Don’t do it! You have so much to live for! Reverse psychology? Old friend, don’t jump! Use a method that won’t damage your liver. Others need it, you know? Husband, no! Out of my way! I’m not cut out to be a bureaucrat! I’m only anal 78.36 % of the time. I’m not worthy to stamp a form, so I’ll stamp the cement with my body! If you complete your death transaction without filing a suicide.

Replacing your testoster-oil with fem-bot lubricants… can cause wild mood swings. And the effects may be irreversible. Well, let’s get started. No! You can’t! If you have even the slightest respect for the dignity of women- I’m sorry, ladies, but I must do this. Not for you. Not for Bender. But for the proud people of Robonia! Come on. Come on. Come on. I can’t watch this’cause it’s creepy and wrong and sick. However, I will watch out of curiosity. I’m about to begin the process of reshaping Bender’s body.

Oh, Fry! Bender’s my roommate. I ordered him to flush out the professor’s earwax. Hey, Fry? I made you a candle with. What the. ? Oh, now I see. Now I get it. Now the pieces are falling into place. The promotion, the dwarf in my book club who steals my opinions. It’s coming together! I must say this opens my eyes! Another case closed, my dear Watson. For I was blind, but now I see. About last night, that was just a misunderstanding. You didn’t understand? I’ll explain. You were having sex with you.

I thought I heard the doorbell. But I see it was the dork bell. You made a funny good one, Brett. Now, now, no need to give us the business. We’d like a word with your daddy. Whatever. Dad! Don’t worry, boys. I’m sure his father is a perfectly normal, reasonable man. What do you want? Mr. Blob, our sons have come to apologize for damaging your window. They’ve learned their lesson, and they want to make amends. Sorry, sir. Yeah, sorry. You shove your apology into the bottom of your one-way digestive system.

Oh, nice. Now I see why she left Fry. Okay, you’re still clean. I mean, metaphorically. Man, this could take all day. You guys wouldn’t know a chad if it was taped to your. The returns are looking good, Mr. Gore. Thanks, Phil. Here’s to four years of clean air, clean government, and amazing new technologies Philip Fry? NARRA TOR. 12 years passed. Then, this. Philip J. Fry? Phil, some kind of trash can here to see you. He’s coming. Are you made of Tinkertoy? It’s been 12 years.

Oh, I’m sorry, that’s just your body. Look me in the shins and say that! I’ve had it up to here I’m off to hang out with classy heads like me, who appreciate… poetry, philosophy, hats. So long, coffin stuffers! Could one of you coffin stuffers please carry me? Which group of heads is good enough for me? What do you think, Fry? Hi, I’m Claudia Schiffer’s head. I recognize you. Didn’t you have a body? Yeah, but it was holding me back. I just did the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swim Cap Issue.

I stepped on a leprechaun. Yo, you see this over here over there? I’m powering up the clamps. Let us not rush to judgment. But, Skip, that was your lucky robot’s foot what came off of your lucky leg. While it is true that I did wake up with only one foot this morning, there is no proof that my beloved Fanny was involved. Aside from the hacksaw I found under her pillow. Well, what about that Bender guy? You want I should give him the clamps? Not yet, Clamps. Only one thing can prove that he has my lucky foot.

You tricked me into marrying you, didn’t you? Of course not. How’d you do it? Drugs? Hypnosis? No, drugs are for losers. And hypnosis is for losers with big eyebrows. I don’t know what I did to make you love me. But we’re married now. We’ve got the rest of our lives. The divorce is final. Let’s divide up the china. and you can have the AFC. Fine. Break my heart again. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You lost the woman of your dreams… but you still have Zoidberg. You all still have Zoidberg.

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